Wednesday, November 14, 2007

My ideal mate?

I normally dislike doing tags. Because it means I've to normally reveal more personal things about myself, or actually, it is beacause I don't have really much interesting thing to share about and most of the time I can't think of enough things to answer or do a particular tag.

However, I recently noticed there are quite a few people doing this and sadly enough I got tagged, by quite a number of people. Anyway I think this tag is worth doing, quite interesting. So here goes..

Rules:
1. Tag victim has to come out with 8 different points about his/her ideal mate.
2. Gender of his/her ideal mate has to be mentioned.
3. Tag 8 other people and leave a comment on their blog.


Good communication & the ability to "click".
I think the most important basic ingredient you need to form a good and lasting relationship, especially in the early years, is communication. Both parties can be very much in love with each other but if they can't communicate and talk with each other comfortably and naturally, then this relationship will definitely not last. I can't imagine living the rest of my life with someone whom I could barely talked too, or worst, feel awkward everytime we are alone together.

Trust
Trust is also very imporant, both ways. I need to be with someone I'm able to trust and vice versa. I'm a very insecure person and my imagination would run wild if you know what I mean. I can't live with someone whom I'll be asking myself: "Where is she going? What is she doing? Who is she with?" everytime she goes out late. And I certainly wouldn't want her to think that of me too when I'm out and not with her. At the end I think this should be linked back to good communication. There wouldn't be any insecurities like these if they can read each other like a book.

Appreciative
I would certainly want someone whom is appreciative for every single thing I do for her. I would definitely try my best to provide her with everything in the world if I could, but it would be pointless and heartbreaking if she doesn't appreciate anything and take things for granted. Would be nice to be with someone who'll even appreciate even if you give her the smallest and cheapest gift and doesn't judge you or starts gossiping to her girlfriends about how cheap you are.

Dependant
I would love to be with someone who will be dependant on me, with moderation. Dependant, but not sticky. Because I'm the type of guy who believe in supporting for my wife, and kids. Yes of course I would want her to be independant too, but ultimately I would want her to depend on me for as much things as possible. To depend on me from financial issues, to the smallest things in life - like picking out what kind or what color flowers we should buy for our wedding reception =).
Don't misunderstand here to think that I am some control freak. Of course I would want her to also have a good occupation, to have her own group of friends to have fun with and also have a stand on her own opinion. Just saying that I would be there for her for anything and everything, and that she can come to me and lean on me for anything at all.

Beautiful. Where it really matters.
For those who know me well enough, I'm not the type of person who will be with a girl just because of her looks or assets. She can be the most beautiful and prettiest looking girl in the world with the best, most perfectly shaped body you've ever set your eyes on (e.g.: Jessica Alba); but seriously, how long do you think these will last? Sure she may look like nothing you've ever seen before when she's at her ripest age, but when she starts reaching her 40s, she'll literally become nothing you've ever seen before.
Beauty is only skin deep. What really matters is who she is inside. And if she's really the most beautiful person inside, than I would still definitely and certainly continue loving her even if she's unfortunate enough to get into a accident and scar her face for life. Because, after all, when you really truly love someone, just the scent of her hair, the touch of her skin and the smile on her lips is more than enough to experienced heaven's blessing...even if she's about to take her last breathe.

Understanding, patient and reasonable.
I would really need to be with someone who is understanding and reasonable. All my life I live with someone who is very unreasonable and everything BUT understanding. Imagine coming home from a tiring and stressful day of work only to find your wife nagging you on and on and on about every single thing that she think is wrong about you, and totally ignoring the fact that you are totally exhausted and would just need a little peace and quiet - that would definitely be a living hell and I wouldn't want to return home after work!
To add to that, I'm a person who handle stress very badly. Especially when things need to get done in a insanely short time, I am capable of losing myself and start scolding and screwing everyone around me who can't do what I asked perfectly. And I am extremely ashamed and embarassed and I really hate myself for this. So when all hell breaks lose for me and when everything I'm trying to do around me seem to be falling apart when my time is almost up, it would be nice to have someone who can be understanding enough to stand by me to let me know that everything is going to be ok and to also encouraged me.

Good in...bed
I may seem abit too young to add this but to be very honest, this is very VERY important in every relationship, especially in marriages. You have to admit it that most marriages turned sour because later on in their marriage, their sex life turns sour too. And this is when one person who needs more, will be tempted to go out to find more, and things will start falling apart. So yes, having a good and healthy sex life is very imporant, would even be better if my partner is adventurous - why confined sex only in the bedroom??

"To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do us part."
But ultimately, this IS the most important. I would really hope that my ideal mate can hold on to: "for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do us part". In the end when we're old and living out our few final years of our lifes, we will have no one else but each other to hold on too. =)


*Editted*:
A little something I missed out.

There are some people who asked me whether I would date a non-christian girl or not, since I didn't state that above.

Well, the reason why I didn't state it above is because it didn't even cross my mind to ever date a non-christian girl! It's really impossible to picture myself to share my entire life with a non-christian partner. Even being together with a weaker christian partner will also eventually pull you down to self destruction. So...no, I will never date a non-christian girl. At least that's what I say now and I hope I'll stick to it because I'm really afraid of this phrase: "Love is blind".

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